Having a hookup buddy is the thing that dreams are made of for a lot of men. A woman who doesn’t expect commitments and is willing to put out is a wet dream that many men have been chasing for years. The fallacy to this is that men think that women aren’t interested in this kind of relationship which is dead wrong. Women, especially the high-powered women of today, are interested in saving time and many of them have put aside their relationship goals in order to focus on their career. Having a sex friend allows them to achieve the release that they need without having to jump through the same relationship hoops that men loathe jumping through when they just want a good time.
The key to a successful hookup buddy relationship requires
maturity from both parties, good timing and (you guessed it)
communication. The better your communication is, the easier this
relationship will be to have and maintain.
Finding Yourself A Hookup Buddy
When thinking about someone you want to have sex with, it’s
easy to get caught up in their image or your level of attraction to
them. While these factors are important, you want to make sure that you
find someone that you’re comfortable with. Whether you seek out an old
friend or go into this with something new, make sure that it’s someone
who isn’t high strung and won’t change the rules on you without notice.
The most important rule being that this relationship is about sex and nothing else. While you can be friendly, the whole point of this arrangement is to not have to spend too much time on it.
Asking Someone to Be Your Hookup Buddy
Now this is something which is never easily broached and
you would do well to be cautious when asking this question. To be too
blunt right from the very beginning is sure to burn some bridges and
greatly increases the chances of you being told where you can go. While
the basis of the relationship is sex, it’s rare for someone to want to
be blatantly asked if they’d like to go sneak into the back room. The
best thing to do is to enter into a frank (but not vulgar) sexual
discussion. If you can discuss the idea of a sex friend like two
open-minded adults both parties will not only be more well prepared for
what to expect from your sex friend relationship, but also will feel like they’re with someone who has put a lot of thought into their expectations.
While we’re not here to endorse drinking alcohol, sometimes
it can help make the conversation flow a little easier as long as it’s
taken in moderation. Drinking too much to calm your nerves will only end
up with the two of you either making a bad decision or one of you
getting turned off.
How to Keep A Hookup Buddy
Now this is the tricky part. You would think that asking
would be the hardest part, but we’ve saved the hardest for last. It’s
easy when in a fuck buddy relationship to let yourself get carried away
and focus in completely on the sex. This is completely natural
considering that sex releases Serotonin which is the chemical that is
brings on calmness, satisfaction and release from stress . Your body is
programmed to chase after that like a greyhound after a rabbit. You want
to keep things casual though both for you and for whichever friend you
choose. If you go at it too quickly and too often, you’ll burn out the
relationship and a sex friend relationship which could have lasted for
many months will be over within a week.
If it’s someone you know and you have to see them outside of the bedroom, keep it casual.
Remember that you don’t have any claim on them and they don’t have any
claim on you. The less intimacy you have with a fuck buddy, the better.
You don’t want any emotional intimacy in this relationship as that leads
to the development of feelings. Instead, focus on that physical
intimacy that you’ve been craving.
Following that train of thought, don’t ask your hookup buddy
out for movies, dinner or drinks. While you might think that you’re just
being friendly, you’re sending out mixed signals to your fuck buddy
that could muddy the waters and potentially ruin things for you.
Remember, this is a no strings attached relationship
and both of you signed up to keep it this way. While there is always a
chance that feelings could happen, you should be able to avoid that
pitfall (unless you don’t want to) and just enjoy comfortable, easily
available sex whenever you and your hookup buddy are both free.
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